Soon 2B Sixty-three

I'll be 63 next month and as I slide into the final phase of my life, I sit here reflecting on what a wild strange trip it's been

I am not afraid of Death; that's the good news

and all these years of studying, meditating, "digging" . . . perhaps I will never come up with the "unified field" theory of reincarnation or write "the book" or do any of those magical things I've considered as inevitable

but it doesn't matter

because I am convinced we live on, that this isn't "all there is"

that is the benefit of all this work, this feeling of safety as I move closer to the pre-ordained final breath

I have had a good run -- been an actor in Hollywood, a business person flying around the country, riding in first class and staying in fancy hotels, had the chance to have a magical amazing child and watch her grow into a magical amazing talented woman

beautiful women, beautiful places, moments that were truly transcendent

but I've also had dark times, too --- lots of them

times when nothing seemed to work, times when I seriously thought about exiting, giving up

but my faith in God (not Jesus but the God I feel in my heart) kept me going

thinking, somewhere, something beautiful would find me

and even if that beauty sometimes "disappeared" and the darkness was all I could see, I still held on to that faith
more than all other things, this is the gift

of "the gift"

Death is not the end; I am convinced of this

and so aging moving closer to my inevitable transition doesn't worry me

I believe we live on

and so . . . the final days take on new meaning

knowing we are all connected to God, always, all the time

all the time
​
the #gift