I repeated one of my standard AndyLand mantras: "Self Love = Healthy Boundaries"
but most people can't create this (and this was me, too, for at least 40 years) since they don't have "Self Love"
and until you understand "why" you don't have "Self Love", you will NEVER have a healthy boundary . . . because, bottom line, you don't believe you DESERVE a healthy boundary
and without this
you will always have a #limited life
people without boundaries have been taught that their needs are SECONDARY and the person who PLANTED this seed in their mind, did so
because they put their needs AHEAD of the child
making, often times willfully, the child a mental slave
this is where it starts and the old adage about you love the jailer starts right here
and if you want a "normal life" you have to go back, "review your case", and realize you were "imprisoned"
because it served some functional need for the "suppressor"