Held Back

far too often -- and I see it and talk about it with someone pretty much every week

women who have been abused in some way as young girls

will be magnetized to relationships in which that abuse continues -- as they cannot recognize the magic they bring

and they are subject to be in relationships in which the man's "goal" is to make sure the woman never understands just how magical she truly is

the women "can't see it" -- because they have been "taught" something else

and the men they attract often can't hang with the woman at full-strength, so they try to "keep" them off balance so they don't recognize their husband / boy friend is a dodo head

and either (a) leave or (b) push them to "be better"

this is a tragedy and a tragedy that is widespread

sometimes women with this background will seek out men to help them re-write their internal "scripts"

but being unconsious of the magnititude of reaction, as well as the true inception point of the attitudes leading to dysfunction

they will revert to patterns in which they are seeking someone to "convince" them this script is incorrect

but no amount of "convincing" will change their minds -- as they are unaware of why they think this way

this entire "process" is a bandaid on a broken bone

in the context of a "psychic reading" I am pretty good (I think, anyway) in helping women expolore this

but as a "boy friend" this is not a place in which I care to go

I refuse to be the therapist boyfriend as I have been there too many times

. . . to meet me half-way, the woman has to have done her own work before she shows up

at least on some level

I ain't all that -- but I AM fairly self-aware

and I have a better idea not only of my own buttons but also who is likely to push them

I try to avoid those situations in which they can be pushed

. . . you give up one thing in hopes of getting something better, later, in return

for women, as they became more fully "conscious" of where their "buttons" are -- and what is likely to push them

they can make choices as to who to "invite" into their world -- the same holds true for men, too

each of us (certainly true for me) has likely done some silly things in past relationships that were "grounded" in unconscious, compensatory "beliefs"

PLANTED

when we were children -- as we "evolve" and understand this, we can "choose" to (a) stop trying to fix others and, more importantly (b) stop allowing others into our world

who want to "fix us"