Father Figuring

It is fascinating to me that when I "try" to discover past life connections with my parents -- they always show up as past lives in which we were adversaries in some form

especially my father -- who died long ago and often gets left out a bit in shaking the family tree

I keep "looking" for the silver lining baby unicorns between us but never find them

the theme with my father is one of jealousy -- he is (stereotypically) the rough hewn soldier and I am the commanding officer, blonde and glamorous

and they all hate me, him most of all

it is "interesting"

this "theme" repeats as I see it in multiple iterations . . . always the same; me, the upper-class officer, rich, flamboyant
him -- lower class enlisted man, with a deep seated hatred for all I "represent"

I realize that this could be reflective of deep-seated "issues" of which I am not fully conscious and certainly accept this as a strong possibility

Freud knew shit :)

however, I am fairly "good" at seeing things, even things about myself
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and so I wonder what (if anything) it all "means"