because our self-esteem is "off-center"
and it is often this failure to embrace opportunities as they are presented that is the true tragedy
many of us with this History (as I am almost a poster child for how this has manifested, slaying Golden Geese by the score as a "result" of unconscious attitudes growing out of my childhood)
struggle terribly and paint ourselves into compromising situations others would manage to avoid
forgiving ourselves for taking longer to "wake up" is often a complicated process
as the echoes of childhood keep echoing and the compound fractures of our lives spread
due to this "failure to respond appropriately"
if this is your history, too . . . please take some time to honor your process
and give yourself permission to grieve the "lost time"
knowing it can never be recovered -- a tragedy on an epic scale
but the beauty of this process is that with awareness and self-forgiveness
you can always move ahead and make something beautiful, with what you have from where you are