Did I work all these years to "understand" my "psychic abilities" so I could make money or did I do it because it was such a part of me I couldn't separate from it to see life without it?
For me, the answer is definitely from Column # 2. It was with me all along and I HAD TO MAKE SENSE OF IT and make "Peace" with it, too, as much as I could.
Leaving the business part of my psychic abilities "behind" is a sign, a very obvious sign, of my own health and it means, to me, also that I have finally integrated this wild stallion into my world in all its multi-faceted brilliance.
When I quit before, back in 1992, it was in the midst of all kinds of chaos and ultra-funky vibrations from my infomercial (and the behind the scenes wheelings and dealings) -- not to mention that my ex-wife hated my working as a psychic, especially one who did "murder cases" ('cause surely someone would kill our entire family to shut me up !!)
and she also hated being married to "The Psychic Adonis" because she thought I got "too much attention" so I quit -- partly against my will . . . I had a chance to continue on TV with millionaires in my corner and I was young and handsome and the Golden Goose was sitting right there in my doorway; it was truly "my time" but I was a coward so I took the fork in the road that led nowhere and . . . well, zippie dee doo dah, life goes on. Now, though, I am excited by what lies around the next bend on my personal highway and so this time, I am doing it more on my terms.
My clairvoyance is a gift, a truly beautiful gift -- but a much different gift than I originally imagined :)
All education comes with a price and I have paid a big price for mine but what I learned -- so beautiful !! And so the wheels on the bus turn round once more :)